Revenge Time

As I mentioned a couple posts ago, I love what I get to do. Traveling the world, promoting our brand, and developing new customer relationships gives me energy and purpose.  I truly believe what we are doing makes a difference. 

At the same time, however, I also miss my wife and kids every night I spend on the road.  My wife is heroic in her ability to handle the boys all the while being pregnant with our third, a little girl.  I can honestly say that I have never gone into a trip thankful that I "get to go away," and I am always thankful when the United plane I am on lands at O'Hare.  Chicagoland is home, and home is good. 

I used to struggle with this tension.  What I have learned, however, are two principles that have helped me gain perspective.  I hope they help you too: 

1. "This is a tension to manage, not a problem to solve" Andy Stanley

Andy Stanley's perspective on various leadership issues has tremendously guided me through the years.  The statement above, which I heard on his leadership podcast a while back, helped me reframe various situations in my life.  For example, if work travel was a “problem,” that implies it is solvable.  The choices may not be pretty, but I could ignore the family, change jobs, or even change roles in the company.  However, understanding work travel and family are both good and important things, I can rather manage the tension.  Please notice that I am not claiming one more important than the other--such a discussion is not the intent of this post.  But calling the situation a "tension" as opposed to a “problem” changes the way we approach it.  This isn't to say that extended time away with the family is unimportant, as we will see with number 2 below. 

2. "Revenge time" Bill Hybels  

One of the non-negotiable events on my yearly calendar is the Global Leadership Summit founded by Bill Hybels.  Like Andy, I am greatly indebted to Bill's thoughts on leadership.  One such idea is the concept of revenge time.  Living in the church world, Decembers are very busy for Hybels and most other pastors.  As he has detailed publicly, this used to cause angst to him as a father.  To combat this, he developed a concept called "revenge time" where every Christmas morning he and the family would fly somewhere fun to spend the next couple weeks together.  He sold this to his kids as "revenge" on the church for taking their daddy away!  I love this concept because it prioritizes uninterrupted family vacations, an issue I am passionate about.  Further, the concept comes from someone whose life revolves around leading a mega-church and traveling the world to promote the Global Leadership Summit.  In other words, if it is okay for Bill to get "revenge," it is okay for me too!  The type A in me needs permission! 

Speaking of, next week our family is going on a "revenge week."  I am looking forward to some uninterrupted time with them.  In fact, I crave it.  So don't expect new blog posts next week, but I will re-post two of the popular ones from earlier this year. 

Before I sign off, I do want to say thank you to all of those who have sent along encouragement with this blog.  Writing a blog can be scary, so your generous encouragement has often been a life-line.  Thank you for the bottom of my heart. 

Comments

[OliveCitronOreg]

I'm in charge of developing the international market. An important part of my job is travelling and this often comes with a huge sense of guilt of leaving the family behind (even a bit of anxiety before each trip). The lesson I take away from this post: Managing the tension and "Revenge-time": you've given me a whole new perspective. Thanks for sharing!